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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 5:08:10 GMT -5
They said it couldn't be made! They said it wouldn't be made! They even went so far to say it shouldn't be made! But today, screw the government, today is a day for CHEEZ and FESTING!!!! (Hence the title)
I never thought we'd have another one of these since last time I believe we were still in a bit of a war... but here we are now! I need not explain the function of Cheez Fest! It is simply a day of fun, excitement, entertainment, gaining cholesterol, and extravangaza! So come and take a seat! Watch some skits, eat some cheese, buy some products! And don't forget about the night's BIG TIME LUNAR PYROTECHNIC FIREWORK SPECTACULAR brought to you by your friends on the Moon!
Come one come all! Space is not limited and neither is fun! If you wanna come on stage and do something, for chum's sake do it! If you wanna sell something, sell it!* Today is a day of rejoice! Do not be angry and do not be spiteful! Sheath your blade for but a day, and shake hands with those you call foe!
::Chupacabras march out with long trumpets:: Heyo heyo! [glow=red,2,300]IT'S CHEEZ FEST TIME!!![/glow] [glow=red,2,300]AIIIIIIIII!!!![/glow]
*the Moonatic Empire claims half of all profits gained during Cheez Fest...
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 5:20:15 GMT -5
Welcome to Da Cheez Stand! Please place your orders and we will supply you with only the greatest, tastiest, most premium cheeses known to man: past, present, and future!
Here is our list of exquisite cheeses! Mozzarella, American, Swiss, Provolone, Cheddar, Blue Cheese, Riccota, Monterey Jack, Baby Swiss, Gouda, and Parmesan!
And here is our list of non exquisite cheese... Nacho cheese
And here is our SPECIALTY/NOVELTY cheese list! Sewell Cheese (named after Jason Sewell, this cheese ir sure to make you wanna hit him!)
Moon Cheese (the ever popular novelty cheese found only on the Moon! Let your taste buds sore once more with this cheese!)
And brand new for this year.....::drumroll:: Doc Gimpy's Particle Accelerated Cheese of the Future! (created using futuristic technology that Doc Gimpy aquired with the use of his Time Traveling Hummer! This cheese is light and airy yet powerfully flavorful and makes you want to eat more while being relatively healthy! Take this back to your friends and spread the word! This cheese scientifically rocks!)
::Leaves sign on counter:: It's 3:00 AM here and I'm going to sleep but should wake relatively soon. Please help yourselves to your orders!
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Post by MightySage on Sept 5, 2004 8:25:35 GMT -5
CHEEZ FEST!!!!!!!!!! ;Dhmmm...theres something missing....ah,i know!*magics up a kareoke stand,a movie theater showing all back to the future movies,and sveral buffet tables that only have cheese flavored stuff*and i would like some famous moon cheese gimpy!
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Post by Googy McFloogal Puss on Sept 5, 2004 9:26:11 GMT -5
LET'S PARTAY!!!
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 15:50:26 GMT -5
Er, I woke up later than expected, but no matter! Let's begin this thing!
Goes to kareoke stand and grabs the mike. This little number is for those who remember the good ol' days!
::music starts:: I got my first real six-string Bought it at the five-and-dime Played it til my fingers bled It was the summer of '69
Me and some guys from school Had a band and we tried real hard Jimmy quit and Jody got married I shoulda known we'd never get far
Oh when I look back now That summer seemed to last forever And if I had the choice Ya - I'd always wanna be there Those were the best days of my life
Ain't no use in complainin' When you got a job to do Spent my evenin's down at the drive-in And that's when I met you
Standin' on your Mama's porch You told me that you'd wait forever Oh and when you held my hand I knew that it was now or never Those were the best days of my life Back in the summer of '69
Man we were killin' time We were young and restless We needed to unwind I guess nothin' can last forever - forever, no
And now the times are changin' Look at everything that's come and gone Sometimes when I play that old six-string I think about ya wonder what went wrong
Standin' on your Mama's porch You told me it would last forever Oh the way you held my hand I knew that it was now or never Those were the best days of my life Back in the summer of '69
Thank you! That was "Summer of '69" by Bryan Adams! Available now for e-mail by Gimpn Music Services!
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 16:06:15 GMT -5
More karaoke! DJ, hit track number 48!
Rollin Rollin rollin! Rollin rollin rollin! Rollin rollin rollin! Rawhiiiiiiiiiiiide!!! Rollin rollin rollin, though the streams are swollen, keep them doggies rollin rawhide! Rain and wind and weather, hell bent for leather! Wishing my gal was by my side All the things I'm missing, good fiddles, love, and kissin' Are waiting at the end of my ride!
Move em on, hit em up! Hit em up, move em on! Move em on, hit em up rawhide! Ride em in, cut em out! Cut em out, ride em in! Ride em in, cut em out! Cut em out, ride them in rawhiiide!
Keep movin movin movin, though they're dissaprovin', keep them doggies movin' rawhide! Don't try to understand em, just rope em, pull em, brand em! Soon we'll be living high and wide! My heart's calculating, my true love will be waiting! Be waiting at the end of my ride!
Move em on, hit em up! Hit em up, move em on! Move em on, hit em up rawhide! Ride em in, cut em out! Cut em out, ride em in! Ride em in, cut em out! Cut em out, ride them in rawhiiide!
Rollin rollin rollin, rollin rollin rollin, rollin rollin rollin, rawhiiiiiiiiide! HIYAH! RAWHIDE!!!
"Rawhide" by the Blues Brothers, also available from Gimpn Music Services.
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Post by MightySage on Sept 5, 2004 16:29:32 GMT -5
time for my magic act!*snaps fingers, is now dressed in tv magician clothes*for my first trick,i will pull a chupacabra out of my hat!*reaches into hat and pulls out bender dressed as a chupa* bender:bite my shiny metal ass!! audience:*claps* now,i shall saw a person in half!*snaps fingers,poofing up alex in a box with his head and feet sticking out* alex:hey!get me out of here! now to saw him in half!*takes out a chainsaw and saws alex in half* alex: OH MY GOD!!!!IT HURTS!!!IT HURTS!!!!GOD DAMNIT!!!!! *stops sawing and sees blood on chainsaw*errr...oops...sorry about that....*heals alex* alex:I AM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU AFTER I GET OUT!!!*struggles,trying to get out of the box* i am gonna have to fix that...*erases alex's memory and poofs him back into audience* alex:...what just happened? now i will make a voulenteer disappear!*points at shrimpy*you! shrimpy:*two chupas grab him and put rubberbands over his claws*hey!let go of me before i rip you a new hole!*is put in a box* right now,*points his staff at the box* Abrakadabra!*box explodes,leaving shrimpy battered(lol,get it? ) and bloody on the floor*uh....oops.....wrong magic words....*snaps fingers,summoning two guys with a strecher*i will be back shortly,just need to bring shrimpy to a hospital and make him sign a contract saying that i am in no way responseable for his medical bills!*leaves*
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 18:58:28 GMT -5
More karaoke! I love this...
All our times have come Here but now they're gone Seasons don't fear the reaper Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain… we can be like they are Come on baby… don't fear the reaper Baby take my hand… don't fear the reaper We'll be able to fly… don't fear the reaper Baby I'm your man... Valentine is done Here but now they're gone Romeo and Juliet Are together in eternity… Romeo and Juliet 40,000 men and women everyday… Like Romeo and Juliet 40,000 men and women everyday… Redefine happiness Another 40,000 coming everyday… We can be like they are Come on baby… don't fear the reaper Baby take my hand… don't fear the reaper We'll be able to fly… don't fear the reaper Baby I'm your man...
Love of two is one Here but now they're gone Came the last night of sadness And it was clear she couldn't go on Then the door was open and the wind appeared The candles blew then disappeared The curtains flew then he appeared… saying don't be afraid Come on baby… and she had no fear And she ran to him… then they started to fly They looked backward and said good bye… she had become like they are She had taken his hand… she had become like they are Come on baby… don't fear the reaper
"Don't Fear the Reaper" by the Blue Oyster Cult.
Where's Alex been? We need his stage antics!
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 19:02:13 GMT -5
I have an idea for this year! This year I will give rides in my Time Travelling Hummer to those willing enough to take its risks! Just tell me where you want to go and we'll go!
The Moonatic Empire is not responsible for mental harm caused to those who use the time machine...
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 5, 2004 21:11:20 GMT -5
Where is everybody!? We can't have this little participation on Cheez Fest! I haven't even run out of free complimentary pickle jars...
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Post by Bengl Von Shadowstein on Sept 5, 2004 23:42:53 GMT -5
*arrives in a puff of smoke whearing a top hat and a black cape*
Bengl: I, the Amazing Bengle, will make a F**k head dissapear before your very eyes!
*opens curten revialing jesse ray cristensamagiger of whatever the hell his name is in a cage*
*crowd ghasps*
Drum roll please? *drum roll begins and bengl shoots jesse with a plasma gun instantly disinagrating him*
Bengl: Well folks, it just goes to show ya', dont come to any of my magic shows if I hate you!
*crowd cheers*
Bengl: thank you! thank you!
*walks off stage*
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Post by MightySage on Sept 5, 2004 23:46:07 GMT -5
we shall hold the cheez fest longer then gimpy!it shall grow,grow untill it is larger the my oddities shop!!!!! ;Dbring me to the day the titanic sunk!*hops in the hummer*
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Post by Bengl Von Shadowstein on Sept 5, 2004 23:48:36 GMT -5
No Gimpy! take me in the hummer! i need to stop myself from flushing my contact lenses down the toilet yesterday!
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Post by Gimpy,LordofallthatBreathes! on Sept 6, 2004 0:05:43 GMT -5
Hop in Bengl! Your destination is closer, thus we will go there first! ::The Hummer gains a speed of 88 mph and blasts in September 4th, 2004!::
The Hummer crashes through Bengl's bathroom wall and his September 4th counterpart is terrified! the September 5th Bengl jumps out of the vehicle and grabs his contacts from the September 4th Bengl, and then smacks him on the head. "Don't be stupid!" he says, and then gets back in the Hummer. They depart back to the present!
Mightysage it's your turn! BAM!!!!!!! TITANIC SINKING DAY!!!
The Hummer's grav drive is initiated and it soars above the massive ship. "Look! There's the ship and there's the iceburg!" Gimpy yells. They watch. Suddenly five huge squid tentacles grab the ship and pull it under after breaking it in half! People jump into the beast's mouth and hit the aft propellers! "So that's how it all went down..." mutters Mightysage. "Ok, your time is up. GET IT! TIME IS UP! YOU'RE IN A TIME MACHINE!!!!" Gimpy hollers with might!
SLAM!!!!!! Back in the present.
How do your brains feel boys? Any.....trouble? ::shifty eyes::
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Post by Bengl Von Shadowstein on Sept 6, 2004 0:09:35 GMT -5
Im fine.... i guess... oh, Gimpy! can you take me to halloween of 1995? i need to stop myself frome eating that fake spider web decoration.
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